A Day Without A Photo

(The photo is of Ben and Rachael on May 22, 2004)

Yesterday was one of the best days for me in a very very long time, maybe even years. This is not because of a poverty of good days, but a testament to how really great yesterday was.

For the first time in a very very long time, Matt, Ben, Rachael and I were home together, just the four of us, the nuclear family sans a spouse, a granddaughter and a boyfriend. This was an unexpected treat, the result of Rachael's earlier decision to come up for a few days and Ben's asking her if she was planning to make the trip some time soon.

Rachael arrived on Thursday and I was able to have some very special time with this very amazing young woman; Ben joined us yesterday at around 3:30 p.m.. While it was still light, the two of them wrestled a heavy desk that we no longer use from our over-crowded storage room into Ben's SUV. They worked together in flawless harmony as they did this, then positioned an old TV stand next to the desk. With these new acquisitions, garage sales, Craig's List and hand-me-downs from Ben, Rachael's new home has gradually been getting furnished.

Ben's update tour followed: my glass studio which has taken over the garage, the empty kitty litter containers that I have been saving to use to build marvelous superstructures with Maddie when she is older, an insect corpse for when she is even older (if her interests take such a turn), an amazing collage created by a young visually handicapped and schizophrenic woman, the photo of which is at full power so that you can see its intricacies by clicking on it.

And then it was on to the family room and Ben and Rachael reminiscing about the very recent (and first) conversation between Ben and James, Rachael's boyfriend, about finding joy in the small delights of lavender scented body soap and eucalyptus oil in the shower. We laughed about the non-masculine tenor of this conversation and how neither men could be found lacking in this quality. Ben mentioned seeing Paris Hilton sweep through a Vegas night spot; we talked about the joys of anonymity. Rachael showed us her design for turning her four bedroom house into one with three bedrooms, one of which would be a master suite which is currently lacking, and why this would be a fabulous idea in terms of its resale value. This led to the dreary subject of mortgage defaults and unemployment and the still sucky state of the U.S. economy. And on and on the conversation wandered. At leaving time, I told Ben how much I appreciated his taking this time away from his family to be with us. And so he left and then this morning, at 5:45 a.m, so did Rachael, headed for an early morning meet up with some friends to go surf kayaking.

Today, in the precious silence of their absence, the joy of their visit lingers. This morning I was startled by the realization that it was a day without photographs. And startled again when I realized that this was good. There is a freedom to sometimes living beyond the reach of the lens.